introducing me-time

In the previous two blog post I introduced:

-          Two meanings of content

-          Two positions of content: (co-)creator and end-users

I started to explain how being actively involved in the content of your life, as a co-creator, opens the way to make structural changes in a sustainable way.

But only logging in in the right place, isn’t changing anything structurally to the system, yet. Although ..... chances are you feel already in a slightly better position (more content-A).

In that frame of mind, you probably also see opportunities for small changes that would  improve the quality of the content (B). You feel your own influence and so you feel more content-A too.

Compared it again to logging into a database environment online.
Looking at the data stored, you see typo’s in the text somewhere and correct them, you make grammar corrections, update a link here and there and replace a photo with a more recent one. Or you remove to the achieve a whole lot of things nobody has been using for ages. Simple, relatively inconsequential changes, easy to make.

This is nice too and doing these things familiarises yourself with various ways of keeping your data up tot date, which is part of the purpose of the management system.

Structurally however, nothing much has changed.

For structural changes to take place, you need to relate to all data, all routines. That means, moving a step deeper into the settings of your systems, to the heart of it, the core, the control centre.

This may take a little more imagination to do in your off-line life shaping exercises.
It also takes a little bit more discipline in paying attention with full focus, courage and awareness of consequences.
Changing a setting in your core settings, has much more effect in more places than changing a ‘;’ into a ‘,’ in a text, as you can imagine.

Just ‘ doing it’ and ‘ see what happens’ may not be the wisest strategy to apply.
If all your systems go down as a result, can anybody support you?
If your whole appearance ( what you present to the world) changes in look and feel, will it scare your loyal customers ( friends, family, co-workers, clients etc) away? Do you want that?

But then again, if your system settings are outdated and not producing desirable results to your highest standard of quality anymore to your single most loyal end-user who spends a  complete lifetime with you (yourself!) anymore...something needs to be done!

From here it may get even a little bit more abstract.
The issue here is that, as far as I know, there is no concrete physical control panel to change these settings with your fingertips, that I can show you where it is, what it looks like  and how it works.
These settings are made using your mind, your thoughts.

But since that is the same ‘ device’ and ‘ interface’ you use as a user, you really have got to be aware of where you are in the process. There is no icon in the right hand corner indicating that you are logged in, no impressive menu structure looking distinctively differently from the users-interface.

What helps, to my mind, is to divide your time actively between two distinctively different things:

-          Service as usual, where you are open to the outside world, to work, play, socialise etc.

-          Me-time, where you are disconnected from the outside world. You are not involved in tasks for or with anybody else.

Me-time is the time where you go to the centre of your world, the core of your being and spend some time being completely in control of what you do and how you do it.
You are in the centre of your own attention and if and when you feel it is useful, you  monitor your systems. Just observe, to start with.
How am I doing? How am I feeling? What is on my mind?

Change nothing... just observe what asks for your attention, rolls over the screens of your inner eyes and see ( most of) it disappear.

Learn to see that in this mode.... none of what you see( or feel) is what appears like this on the outside. But it is giving you clues about what is going on under the bonnet, the place where you can make the desired changes, by the time you’ve got a good feel for it all.

To most of the people in the Western World at the moment, me-time is difficult.
We have programmed ourselves with the understanding that we need to be available and actively ‘doing’ something all day. That we are not-productive, doing ‘nothing’, and anti-social.
We have programmed ourselves with the understanding that  mind chatter is a bad thing that needs to be switched of.
We have programmed ourselves with the understanding that there are ‘ bad’ feelings and if you feel them there is something wrong with you.
... just to name a few.....

These programs kick you out of where your power for change lies, in no-time!

Before you can do anything else, under the bonnet, you’ve got to reprogram the time-out time on your device (your mind) . This is the  time your system allows any logged in user to sit and observe without doing anything.

Set a timer and take every 20 minutes a 5 minute break in which you ‘ do nothing’, you just are, alone with yourself.
You leave all the tasks you were working on and don’t pick up new ones ( no, not even eating, drinking, active toilet use, or smoking!).
You go somewhere where you are alone and you don’t talk to anybody.
All devices are switched of or left behind ( phones, p.c.’s)
You don’t take any input in ( no books, no food, no drinks) except for air, preferably fresh air.

If doing nothing is hard, you can walk. Preferably ‘ to nowhere in particular’, preferably in nature, away from human activities/ energies.

Every time before you go back into the world, ask yourself, do I feel centred?

It doesn’t matter if you don’t, or even have no idea what that would be.
You’ll recognise it when it is there.

That is the feeling that is indicating: you are in full control, right in the middle of you own Universe.

Create the routine of having (that often? Yes! You need to become comfortable with spending time with yourself in the core)  me-time  and feel this centred-feeling when it occurs. 

That is your indicator that you are in the right place to make sustainable structural changes to your life. You are logged in and all control powers are available to you. Happy in yourself.

Happily and confidently self -centred in a complete different meaning than egotistical.

These are the differences:

Happily self-centred: your awareness is involvend in all that is part of your Universe

Happily egotistical:
 your awareness is only involvend in all the parts of the Universe that you feel are pleasing you.
What you don't like (although relevant to your world) is kicked out of the awareness.

To be continued....