Self expression

A key word in the world of self-development, seems to be ‘ self expression’.

To go from a human being version that is not entirely at ease with life to a version who experiences life to be good, on all scores, most advisors( like life coaches)  reckon that it helps to be as authentic as you can: know yourself and express that.

Through modern media, this snippet of knowledge has found all the corners of our modern world, probably because it looks so straightforward and simple.

However, even simple words leave room for many interpretations. 

I see, how you define ‘ self expression’ influences the results you’ll see from ‘ expression yourself more (or differently)’, quite substantially.

First question is: “ Who is this ‘ self’?”
Second question is:” What is expression?”
Third question:” How do the two relate to where I desire to go?”

Who is this self?

You may think, what a stupid and obvious question. My self is me! I am me, I am myself. Look!
But in my own style, I’ll prod some more, if you let me, to get a more detailed idea.

Just browse through some categories that can easily be included and are just as easily excluded too.
Where are you with it?

Am I:

• My thoughts?
• My feelings?
• My body?
• My opinions?
• My beliefs?
• My experiences in the past?
• My routines?
• My values?
• My reasons?
• My fantasies?
• My hopes?
• My dreams?
• My actions?
• My choices?
• My interests?
• My work?
• My roles?
• Or......It depends on who is asking and when and why......, really....

(This list could go on for a while.... just a few options are listed here)

And if you have selected what you consider to be ‘ your self’, may I prod a little deeper?

If you go through the list, would it include for each category the ‘ dark ones’? All of them, some of them?
You know, the ones that reside deep in your inner world. Those that you are not happy and confident with to hold into the light of your ( let alone other peoples ) conscious awareness.
Maybe the things you’d like to ‘get rid of'’ in the process of increasing your life quality? Things you’d prefer to see disappear, dissolve out of (your) life?

All answers to these questions are OK. You are defining yourself as you see it right now, to my mind always a good step to begin navigating new waters.

What is ‘ expression’?

I am aware that in the modern day and age, expressing something is usually meant to be ‘ talking about something’. It usually seems to revolve around ‘ words’.

Is that your idea of expression too?

Is self expression than talking about the things that made it to your definition of ‘ self’, as made in the former paragraph?

I state that what you express in words makes up a maximum of 20% of all your expressions.
Words may make up a much larger percentages of what you are consciously composing to express. That makes that it is more visible on your own radar, it doesn’t increase its  percentage or importance in all of what you express.
You are sending out many other ‘ vibes’ though your tone of voice, pitch of voice, speed of talking, your body posture, facial expressions, your smell, your actions, your aura, etc. etc.

Despite what you consciously chose to talk about (or leave out), whether you like it or not, clues about what you are not putting into words, are abundantly broadcasted too.
I’d say: that life finds ‘ words’ highly limiting and awkward at times, to convey its qualities and it always conveys its real time qualities.
You are part of life, so you convey always your real time qualities ( characteristics) about what life defines to be significant to you. What is significant to you maybe something from your ‘ dark list’..... as a rule of thumbs.... the unhappier you are, the more the majority of your vibes DO come from your dark list, urgently needing to be held into the light of (your) attention. The longer your dark list is, by the way,  the more energy goes into keeping the doors locked to try to keep them in the dark.

Life follows a simple Law: send = receive.
Not sending, would be not living, like a radio station.. not being live.

So even if you where to stop speaking.. you are still sending.

Sending mixed messages = receiving mixed results

Sending clear congruent messages = receiving clear congruent results

Say yes, mean yes, do yes.

Now, the more congruent you operate, the more authentic you are, the better life ‘ gets’, is something most life coaches would agree on.
Also, the broader your sense of self becomes, more aspects of you can see the light of day, openly, happily, confidently expressed in all ways :Always... sometimes in words, but all conveyers are aligned in harmony, expressing the same real time characteristics, just in different ways.
You, whatever you definition of yourself, are in harmony. A huge indicator for receiving ( perceiving) harmony too. Send = receive.

A interesting side effects of this broadening sense of self, is that at some point, it is very possible that you don’t stop being ‘ self’ at the end of your physical fingertips, the end of what and who is on your own conscious awareness, the end of your own past experiences, the end of your own hopes and dreams for the future, your own inner world harmony, your own interests, beliefs and preferences.

In many spiritual books this is referred to as shifting from a consciousness of ‘separation’ ( self = me personally) into a conscious awareness of oneness ( self = us, all of it).
The understanding of Self, has grown a lot bigger.

Fun to me (now).
But  when you fear that your own experiences wouldn’t count anymore and you’ve got to trade in your hopes and dreams, forget about your past, your identity, your interests, beliefs and preferences for the sake of ‘harmoney for all’ ( thinking that means somebody else’s sake, excluding your personal self, isolating/abandoning (crucial elements of) your own personal self) , you might be hesitating to really go for it.  You think you might lose what is precious to your ( individual) self.

That your personal self ( all of it) IS precious to the Self (the collective) might sound as ‘ too  good to be true’.  Not just an only your individual self that is precious to the Self, but the selves of others too, in one system.

Where the Knowing can do so much to guide you.
The collective database of self expression, including all vibrations of expression.